Empty Solo Cups Are a Drain on the Economy

Top Ten Signs Your Vacation is About Over

10. G-day has arrived.

9. If you eat another cheeseburger by the pool you might burst.

8. The wife has threatened that if you play golf one more time, the trip to Stillwater is off.

7. Your wallet is about as thin as the lone dollar bill than occupies it.
6. It's moving day at the Masters.

5. You're developing a rep as the grumpy old man by the pool who insists ALL children display a modicum of civility.

4. The transplants from Michigan are really starting to get on your nerves.

3. Your kids are sick of your sense of humor when you tell them the ice cream shop ran out of ice...then ran out of cream....then is closed on Wednesdays....then only serves to grown-ups....

2. Filling up a cooler every morning and lugging it to the pool is just too much work.

1. Your margarita solo cup looks like this 

Friday's Feedbag

* OkayOkayOkay! Here are the rosters....

* Mark Fox has wasted little time in rounding out his staff.
* Kris Durham will not be dressed out for Saturday's G-Day game...or any game the '09 season.
* Meanwhile it looks like Charlie Weis has met his match on the recruiting trail.
* Orson Charles is ready for the Dawgs to beat floriDuh and is putting his money where his mouth is...in Athens, not Daytona Beach.
* KiffyBaby not only kicks a brand new father off the team, he does so before letting his teammates in on the news. 
* A great look at the details that CMR is focused on this spring.
* Jeff Schultz has a look at one amatuer's rise to the hallowed fairways of Augusta National.
* And if you're like me and love some nice statistics to grapple with, the Senator has your hook up.

Boys and girls, it's been real. But real life beckons and Bernie can only turn his back for so long. Plus I know my lone reader is pissed at the lack of meterial this week. 

And I thought my life was dull.

Don't forget your cans tomorrow. Then tip your cap for lots of points, lots of turnovers and NO INJURIES!!

Bernie

Classroom Achievements - Raising the Bar, or at least Lifting it Momentarily

Discussion Wednesday, as popular now as spearmint flavored dental floss. (Come to think of it, that may be an exaggeration.)

So far we've looked at big-time campus wins, campus traditions and favorite Athens eateries. And by the way, there's a Rita's across the street from the condo here in Hilton Head. As Hale suggested, definitely worth the trip....no, not all the way to HHI for a water ice. I meant to a Rita's near you.

We had cousin Matt over for dinner tonight and he reminded me of a (notice - singular) time I rose above the bar in the classroom while on campus. Matt definitely gots the more smarts in the family. After all, Bernie was not invited to apply to become a Rhodes Scholar. 

But there was this one time I was the only (again - singular), the ONLY student to show up for class.

It was spring of my third year and I was well on my way to becoming a sophomore. I was taking Spanish and had about 25 other classmates. The class was a MWF 2:20 appointment and I was doing pretty well, or as they say in MehHeeKo - b w a y - N o h.

I had stayed late at Tate to wrap up a pool game, but was still ahead of schedule getting up the hill. And when I walked into our classroom - it was empty. I stood in the doorway for a moment and racked my brain for a reason, then cursed myself as I walked away for forgetting a major detail like the professor (or as they say in Spain, p r o -F e s - s o r e) canceling class on a Friday.

I got halfway down the stairs and for some reason decided to go back - perhaps feeling as if I had entered the wrong classroom. This time as I stood bewildered in the doorway, our professor walked in moments behind me.

Crapnockers! Now I had no way out. The entire class was at some park playing frisbee and sunbathing, no doubt laughing their arses off at me - the only sucker dumb enough to show up on nearly a sophomore skip day, stuck here with Profesor Jaime.

Then it happened. He asked me if I had any questions in kind of an impromptu while we're here and today's lesson is shot I might as well help the one dumbass that showed up way. I paused and suddenly saw my only chance at scoring an A in the class.

Of course I said. Then I made my best attempt at coming up with a question, left him with a very passable look of appreciation and was starting my weekend by 3:02pm.

Oh yeh...and I got an A. Or as they say on Buford Hwy: 

e g g s  -  s a y  - L e n  - t a h!

A dramatic representation of Bernie's Spanish class one Friday

So what's your classroom highlight reader? What class presentation did you ace, what group project did you dazzle and amaze with, ...or were you one of my espanol classmates who played frisbee that day?

Monday's....Margarita: Wastin' Away, One Post at a Time

What can I say?....while on vacay, a margarita goes down so much more smoothly than...meatloaf.

Sixteen years ago I wrote a letter. I was nearing the end of my years at UGA and had a bug in my britches over an article I'd read. It seems one Mark Bradley had it in for a man I held in high esteem - Dean Smith.

In the spring of 1993, Dean Smith was one of college basketball's greatest coaches...but had managed just one national title. Bradley thought Cincinnati the better team and threw the Heels to the curb and Deano under the bus.

My letter scolded Bradley and ensured him that he would be eating a slice of "humble pie" by the end of the tournament. No doubt drawing from my over confident collegiate cognizance, the Tarheels beat Huggins' Bearcats on their way to an impressive national title run. To help you gain the visual - it was aided in part by a Chris Webber TO....problem was Meechigan didn't have one to spare at the time.

I've searched my "archives" (aka - the deepest depths of my closet) for the actual letter. No luck. But trust me - it was quite the masterpiece. Nothing like those AJC forums that devolve into a crap load of claptrap. It was well written, to the point, succinctly versed...and undoubtedly had a lasting impact on whoever was Mr. Bradley's intern at the time.

I mention this only because later today UNC goes for another nat'l title tonight; possibly their second under Roy Williams. UNC is my pseudo collegiate basketball dance partner...you know since as a native Athenian the Dawgs rarely provided the exposure a pre-pubsecent mind could really grasp hold of for longer than a season.

That and Mr. Bradley is now following me in the "tweetosphere". No, he never responded to my letter back in 1993. Not even when the Tarheels proved up to the challenge against a difficult regional. Not even when one of the greatest coaches in the history of the game cut down the nets in New Orleans after defeating Meechigan's Fab Five.

Not even when my humble pie was fresh from the oven. A dallop of Cool-Whip Mr. Bradley?

There's a small chance Bradley may read this. Maybe he'll respond below. Maybe he'll hit me up in a "tweet". 

Maybe not. Regardless....Go Heels! Spartans mothers have too high of expectations...

Add these to a cool pitcher and stir well:

• Yoculan's GymDogs reign'd supreme in the NCAA regionals behind the leadership of Kupets and McCool. Kupets was selected Southeast Regional Gymnast of the Year. Now it is on to the NCAA Finals in Lincoln Nebraska Thursday. 
• While on the subject of women's sports, Maya Moore ran away with the women's NCAA player of the year honors. Kid grew up within miles of Bernie, but he takes no credit for the talent she graces the hardcourt with.
• Speaking of ending a sentence with a preposition, check out MikeinValdosta's comment to this Logan Gray profile for a great joke...
• Steve Hummer has a nice piece on our new hoops coach, h/t PWD.
• And as usual, bulldog in exhile puts into words my exact feelings on the hire much better than I could muster my own damn self...
• The Diamond Dawgs had a tough weekend, dropping two of three to LSU. They look to rebound against Winthrop at Foley Tuesday and Wednesday.
• But the men's tennis team defeated Alabama 4-2 at Dan Magill.
  
• David Hale has a feature on the J-K-G front; if you're unfamiliar, #95 may try to make it more recognizable this fall.
• The Senator has the latest in KiffyBaby's recruiting saga from Pahokee...
• I can't decide if Greg Gumbel is just an idiot or legitimately got punk'd. Maybe you will have better luck. Either way though....this puts the friv in frivilous.
• And lastly, speaking of gettin' punk'd...if you missed the now legendary Mike Campo teaching Terrance "Less Would Be" Moore a lesson in humility, check out the first bullet in Hale's Thursday links. 
• Mr. Campo, your cash is no good at Bernie's Bar. Well done my friend. Well done.

If there's a site more beautiful than your little girls enjoying a heated pool beside the beach you just left, begging you to take a dip as you finish your (very) cold beer...brother, I don't know what it is. I'll take five more days of this before I meet you in Athens reader. Don't forget your canned goods. 

As a matter of fact waiter...I would like a refill. 

Gotta go! Salted or unsalted?

Bernie

G-Day Profile - Logan Gray

You know how when you were taking a multiple choice test and the answers just started jumping out at you? Suddenly you're screaming along towards an easy A, selecting answers as if they were classes listed in the OPSTAR (punch card and a prayer, h/t Mike in Valdosta).

Then all of a sudden you go right by a question without even taking the time to focus on the true answer. The teacher slipped one in that completely caught you off guard. You smiled confidently right up until the time you got the test back and realized you had fallen for the oldest teacher's trick in the book. Sucker punched by that attractive answer choice A.

A similar test is being passed out in spring drills over outside of Butts-Mehre. Logan Gray is that elusive answer choice D that is being over shadowed by the 5th year senior who hasn't lost a game since before he could drive to high school and the two young pups still being suckled by Bobo and overwhelmed by his playbook.

Marc Weiszer has a piece on the dual threat QB from Missouri that looks at his chances at cracking the lineup, or just simply getting onto the field for a spell (see - DJ during Greene's reign supreme). 

I've said before that I'm not a big fan of signal callers anywhere in between the hash marks during their freshman campaigns. The last time we tried that it was certainly out of necessity, but it also led to losses to Kentucky...and Vandy during Homecoming. The decision rebounded in time to see Tra Battle beat the War Tigers nearly single-handedly, but overall it was just building blocks to the following season.

I'd prefer to ease 'em into the SEC den of thieves.

Weiszer's not the only person to recognize this trend in appointing Murray and Mett the lead Dawgs to press Cox for playing time this fall a little too soon. Hale gratefully showed his deadhead side as he broke down the redshirt sophomore QB using a touch of Gray a couple weeks ago. And Belue adds his weight to the QB issue as well; although he's more concerned that people are overlooking Cox.

Do yourselves a favor at G-Day Saturday: when #6 trots onto the field, pay some attention. He might be an answer choice this fall....and beyond.

Golf anyone?

This comes courtesy of a buddy who, when he's not brewing Miranda's Climate Friendly Ale is obviously scouring YouTube for golf courses that can challenge his game. (As a side note - I once saw him win a fight with a driver....bent it right across his knee and threw it to the bottom of a pond to chase his Pinnacle 3.)

Epic. Just like this hole...sheeeeesh! At least yelling FORE! isn't really necessary.

Percy Smokes Million Dollar Doobie

This news could cost this gator millions. 

Hope it was worth it Percy Harvey. Go gator...

Optimism Meets Reality, Both Can Be Wiley

At 11am this morning Damon Evans will introduce the biggest hire of his tenure as UGAs Athletic Director. The second guessing... well, that began long before he made his decision.

Mark Fox may one day be recognized as good a coach as Pearl, Donovan, Calipari...but on April 3rd, 2009 in name recognition only, he couldn't be any more a polar opposite. Fans are left wondering how we went from Anderson to Fox.

And for that I believe Evans must take some blame; his words set the fanbase up for a BIG hire. He set his sights high and the media and the fans took off running. From the sublime (Capel) to the ridiculous (Knight). While the mutha and the AllJackCrap pimped their supremely vetted candidates, fans ran rampant with names from Anthony Grant to Tom Izzo.

But give credit to Evans for putting the faith and the resources into a program that has lacked both for years. He aimed high and has given this alum reason to believe hoops is on the rise in the Classic City.

This hire will immediately and continually be compared to Bama's with Grant. There was a public "discussion" between Donovan and Adams re: Grant; both Grant and Fox have been successful at comparable programs; Bama went sans search firm, while Evans added the support of extra eyes and investigative resources; and there was the obvious "pass" on the interview as Bama zeroed in on Grant.

I am of the opinion that Grant would have made the better presser, but fall short of feeling he's all that with a side of chips. The one advantage Grant has over Fox at this point is that he is more familiar with the recruiting roads in GA.

But sometimes a fresh name/face/blood can do wonders in sparking an interest, developing and repairing relationships. My guess is Fox will be able to hold his own there. At least until Jacob Dominique Wilkins turns 18 and chooses UGA for his hoops scholly....in 2024.  : )

I think in the end this hire and the process as a whole fully represents where our program is: looking for the best, but forced to settle for potential. It was nice to dream about Capels and Izzos, but if we wake up with a hidden gem I think we're just as happy.

Friday's Feedbag

• Had a real nice bit on Logan Gray and the QB situation this spring in the can; then Evans decided he'd rather me post on hoops. Note to Damon: I am your pawn, move me in the direction that best serves our blessed institution. (I'll give you your props a little later Logan....)
• Speaking of QBs, Tucker of the AJC adds another log to the freshman QB blaze with this piece that shows a little of JCs sense of self-deprecating humor. And Tucker also promises to feature Gray in a feature Sunday. It may be more in-depth than mine, but I bet mine gets a fraction of his reads - HA!
• Clempson's Saratt bedazzled Georgia batters for eight innings Wednesday night, but had to hand the ball to Vaughn outta the tiggers bullpen in the ninth. Just what Cerione, Poythress and Lewis needed to open up a three run ninth and a come from behind win to sweep a two-game home and home with the urranjah clad diamond dwellers. Will Harvil shut the door in the ninth. Big three game series with LSwho this weekend at Foley for our #1 Diamond Dawgs.
• By the way...if you're going to Foley this weekend, you already have a ticket. All three games are sold out. Hopefully mudda nature shines as brightly as the bullpen did Wednesday night.
• Carvell has the latest in what is the witless wonder's escapades up in the hills. It's a KiffyBaby World, the rest of us are just using the gravitational pull with greater success. And credit the AJC recruiting guy for getting in print what may be the only instance of Laney being humble....albeit in relation to his torso, not his tackle football coaching ability.
• The Queen rules. Literally. But I wonder if the very hip Obama left any Miles Davis or Snoop Dogg on that music player doohickie.
• The pissin' contest in Mile High is finally over. And the winner is....us, the fans that really don't care.

Some programming notes: if you are looking for this week's discussion on Athens' battle against trans fat, it's here. And BDBs official welcome to Coach Fox is here.

I'm on vacation as of Friday after lunch, but have a few things in the can that will keep you occupied while I'm away reader. Of course, if Jenn and I don't win our tennis match tonight, she may have me pack the car just to watch it leave without me.

Don't leave me with the lawn to mow. Don't leave me with the lawn to mow!

I'll leave ya with this: a month ago tomorrow, I laid out the facts for ya reader. I posed the possibility that Evans could be at the table with pocket jacks or trying to draw into a flush. I think he has four clubs and as a fanbase we'll wait to see what the river card turns up.

And hopefully it doesn't come up Eustache. Happy weekend!

Bernie

Welcome to Stegeman Coach Fox

...an eager, deserving fan base awaits.

Bernie's take:

• the swing and miss at Anderson takes away from this hire most of the shine
• the time Evans had, the very public and debated hiring of a search firm, the telling omission of Grant for the interviewees list, the ridiculous rumorings of Capel and the size of the checkbook Evans was working from made this hire a spectacle early and often
  
• Fox is a quality hire that reflects where this program is on the college basketball landscape: eager to dunk (Anderson), settling for a modest layup (Fox) and avoiding the turnover (another year of Felton)
• I'm eager to find out details of the deal
• Terrance Moore is NOT gonna like this one at all

Reader, link yo'self!

Towers broke the story

Mark Fox Bio

PWDs rundown (plus a plethora of comments, most of which are coherent)

The Schlabach & Katz Show

A Hale-ian Wrap-up

Hungry? Let's Grab Some Lunch

Recently the hardest working man on the Georgia Dawgs' beat told us of a new business opening in Athens: a place called Rita's Water Ice. As an Athens native and a UGA alum, it got me thinking (as dangerous as that has proven to be) about eateries around campus...

A hmmm....turned into an uhmmmm!.

An empty stomach after a hard day of frisbee on the quad and playing pool at Tate is a bad combination for a college student. Let's take a trip up Baxter and grab some Guthrie's!

My doctor likes to tell me that I'm still carrying some of that Guthrie's special sauce in my arteries and that all those hot wings from Steve's have taken their toll on my HdL, ....or is it LdL.What the hell! It's probably both.

But I just smile, grab that cold metal disc he's placed on my chest and holler into it, "What can I say Doc? Me likes me some Taco Stand!"

So far we've lent our ears to the southwest corner of Sanford and sobered up in some memories of big wins on campus. Today let's grab a handful of Herbie's Balls and talk about our favorite "meals" around campus.

I don't want to restrict you reader to just food on campus. Afterall, I worked a decade one year inside Bolton. I know how they made that chocolate pudding. So imagine a large triangle from South Milledge all the way up to Prince (grab me an order of onion rings, a chili dog and a frosted orange on your way by the V) and then head over to the East Side and cop a squat at Mama Sid's for a slice.

Pass the bleu cheese and tell me what Athens eatery is clogging your vessels?

Wednesday's a New Day

Issues, topics and otherwise random propositions for your mid-week ponderings:

• Anderson said no thanks, but that wasn't the worst news out of Athens yesterday...
  
• We're down to two (2) DEs for G-Day! No April Fool's. Two...that's it!
• The Diamond Dawgs topped Clempson 6-5. Perno's top ranked team will travel north along I-85 to play the Tigers again tonight, undoubtedly passing the 4-Hers on their tractors somewhere south of Commerce.
• Sounds like Stafford had a good day in Detroit. He's surely done everything he can to impress the holders of the first pick in April's draft.
  
• The news that barely broke wind Monday - Tony Bennett signed on with UVAs hoops program. What surprised me was that it will be to the tune of $1.7 million clams over 5 years. Wow!
  
• Saban is out to prove he's satan's spawn. Whatta cad!
  
• As bad as we'll feel when Capel turns us down and we end up at the table with Haith, we're still having a better week than this guy.

And lastly, David Hale is reporting in his links today that Ron Jirsa is serving as an advisor to Evans at this point in the search. Let's all meet later at Burger King for a left-handed Whopper. I hear they don't come with pickles.
Don't look now but your shoelaces are untied.