Stress Tests and Rehearsals...

...it's enough to make a Georgia boy wanna drink.

Played golf with Uncle Bucks and Cousin Colin. I figured as the in-law, I was being pretty hospitable. By the 10th hole birdie putts had been overshadowed by chest pains and all of a sudden Uncle Bucks is simply driving the cart...not driving the fairways.

But any worry was summarily subdued. The Outer Banks stress test was passed with flying colors and Bucks was smokin' stogies and draining cheap beer as fast as a HillBilly could stammer the words - EKG.

Now Bernie just has to hope his girls perform as well as Bucks during Cousin Wes' nuptial ceremony. Jenn and I have bribed them with their own Coca-Cola at the reception should every flower petal find its correct place on chapel floor.

If not...at least the bar should be stocked with enough Beam to call it even.

Friday Feedbag

• TeamSpeedKills labels LSwhos trip to Athens as a possible loss....for the Hat. Hmmm...2004 comes to mind. Suck it Saban!!
• Meanwhile, Mackie doesn't have the Dawgs going undefeated, but at least he has us beating those overall'd nitwits. Of course it always helps when they exhaust their fingers as tools for keeping score and are forced to use feet digits.
• Tim Tebow completing a pass to AJ Green is about enough to make one spew a pair of jorts...but Hale provides us with all the pre-season SEC selections. Jeff Owens as a third-teamer sounds like bulletin board material to this blawgger....just sayin'.
• Maybe the fact that UGAs lacrosse team has NEVER committed any crimes would weigh in favor for this kid comoing to Athens.
• Exhile's in rehab evidently. And after a week of doing this %$#@ on the road I can honestly say I don't blame the bastard. But still not sure what he means by Grand Tetons.
• PWD rounds up the news that FoxSportsSouth will air some tackle football under the lights. As KY_Dawg explains...it means some of us will need to change some carrier subscriptions. Damnitalltohell!
• Senator Blutarksy has what has to be one of the only ways to reference the best phone call scene from Seinfeld to college football. If you too laugh your rear end off...you're on your own.
• If you've ever uttered the phrase "trailer park style"...this post at Dawg Bloggin' Under the Influence will ring true to heart.

The third episode of Thursdays R Trivial was about as anti-climatic as the birdie putt I missed on #15 yesterday. Still, @MikeInValdosta escaped with the win by (unsurprisingly) knowing that Brew Thru was the franchise best known on the Outer Banks for their libations on location.

For his trouble, Mike takes home three and a half kegs of Keystone Light while @alanashley pockets a consolation prize for knowing that the beer store chain has sold millions of t-shirts since the mid-70s. Enjoy the swizzle sticks Alan. There's a difference between slightly used and experienced.

And please pray for me Reader. After partying hard with Wes and Allison in the wake of their nuptials this weekend, I have agreed to celebrate my 12th anniversary by driving 12 hours home Sunday. I suggested to Jenn that this is not what the preacher meant when he said "honor and obey"....she sharply reminded me that we (conveniently) left that traditional phrase out of the ceremony.

Crapnockers! Well, I trust you will honor your weekend Reader. Enjoy it as if it obeyed your every whim. Just remember that mine will be partially comprised of an open bar.

Suckers!

Bernie

Much More than a Namesake

Given the injury to Tanner Strickland, it's a good time to take a look at one of the heralded offensive line signees from the '09 class. We share little more than a name, but true freshman Chris Burnette is one freshman I will definitely be looking out for come the cooler temps of fall.

Out of Troup Co., Burnette has the skills and the smarts to crack into Searels rotation early. And we all can agree after last season's injury riddled line survived the 13 game schedule one snap at a time, that depth is so very important.

So here's some video of Troup County's most recent salutatorian...and Searels newest stud.

Talking about his decision to go to Athens -

Another focus feature...but with some dazzling special effects -

Here's what some recruiting sites had to say about Burnette. TotalUGA Scout Rivals

Lastly, Hale's Get to Know piece.

Monday's Margarita - Safety in Numbers

Good morning from beautiful Nags Head, NC. The weather's here...wish you were beautiful.

Big commitment over the weekend in Jakar "Hitman" Hamilton. Hamilton is a JUCO All-American from Georgia Military College and chose the Dawgs over the Sabanites, as expected. He should graduate in December and enroll at UGA in January. That could give him a jump start on another couple safeties expected to sign with CMR, Deas out of Florida and GAs own Alec Ogletree.

With the departure of Knox this off-season, the depth at safety has evidently rebounded well.

Here are some links for those who still need to read up on the Dawg's 14th commit:

• DawgPost's workup. Legge's video of the announcement.
• TotalUGA's posting.
• ABHs story.

After a slow start, it's looking like CMR and staff are gathering some steam towards NSD '10. I can almost smell the doughnuts!

Mix em up and CHILL!!

• Trey Tompkins helped lead his teammates to some GOLD!!
• John Isner exacted some revenge on an old foe...and grabbed some good cash in so doing.
• In between cold frothies...Mike spent the weekend profiling and following former Dawg golfer Jean Reynolds' US Open run. Unfortunately she came up short this time. But Mike's glass is always full.
• Ain't nuthin finer in the land....Our beloved Redcoats are getting their own space. And here's a great post from Roughing the Kicker containing a neat story and some great comments from actual redcoats.
• Over at TeamSpeedKills cocknfire argues that despite CMRs success, hoisting the crystal ball matters....allusion to fate intended.
• Quinton takes a closer look at some swiss cheese...er...Okie State defense. The numbers he crunches bode well for CMRs Road Show, which the Senator points out has been pretty impressive.
• RedCrake at DawgSports provides an extensive and optimistic post about CWMs pass rush. Stuff of Legend adds his take.
• And the Anti-Orange Page gives you a chance to say your peace on the issue of black jerseys.

Many thanks to cousin Wes and his soon to be bride Allison for picking the beach as their location to wed this coming Saturday. It's gonna make throwing dried rice in your eyes so much more fantastic!

But this week's biggest shout-out goes to the inventor of earphones for car DVD players. I used to be mistaken that car DVD players were the jackest of all crap. How my parents put up with us for hours in the car with nothing else to do but touch each other provokingly, I'll never effin' know.

Then some Japanese teenager constructs a magic box that plugs into your car's cigarette lighter and boom!, instant civility....with never ending Disney audio to drown out your KISS and Scorpions.

But now the Bernie progeny is splendidly silent for almost 65% of the time we're locked in together. All I have to do is make sure all of Jenn's Motley Crue is loaded and iPod ready. Otherwise the little lady gets really cranky.

So I'll be spending the week with a bunch of Wahoos from Charlottesville, as well as a handful of Hokies from Blacksburg. Despite their ACC affiliations, they're hardly the wine and cheese type; good people that I've spent the last 12+ years indoctrinating into the SEC culture.

They live for the Chick-Fil-A Bowl...we live to aim higher. Yin...yang. Ebb...Flow. Donnan...Welsh. We share bourbon, bloody marys and plenty of laughs. I guess somewhere in there we'll mix in a wedding this time.

When it comes to these in-laws, there's always safety in their numbers. Sure am glad their JP came south for her edumacation. And glad you bellied up to the bar for this Margarita Monday Reader. Enjoy your week. You can keep the little umbrella.

Bernie

Saturday Headers

Evidently some people in the Richmond suburbs don't think too much of protecting their wireless signals. So I'm sneaking in another post. Also hope to have a Monday Margarita shaken in a couple days, but will have to wait and see how the Wi-Fi goes down in the Outer Banks...

So far, it's really tough living like Exhile. I'm not half the blawgger he is as it has become quite evident I'm not cut out for any posting north of Lake Hartwell. But I can give ya some quick links of interest.

• When Rex says rock the vote, you better rock it hard Dawg fans.
• Senator is not only pissed over some lists, but makes a reference to my all-time favorite movie. Inconceivable!
• Macon's Tyler Estep has a good piece on the Dawg fullbacks.
• TotalUGA has some info on next Saturday's Countdown to kickoff.
• Mackie questions the manhood of of Coach Gundy. I guess when Gundy asked to be written about, Ol' Pantsless obliges.
• Cousin Walter explores one of my favorite topics...Slurban gettin' the hell out!
• Daugman has an update on USA basketball...and Mr. Tompkins.
• And lastly, those of you who suffer through Atlanta gridlock have no doubt experienced road rage quite often. I contend it's much less hazardous to your handicap than fairway rage.

Guess that guy won't be in my foursome next week...or anytime soon for that matter. Good or somewhere south of it...make it a weekend Reader.

No Birdies for Bernie...

...but plenty of in-laws.

Just a quick post in between tee times. I'm in desperate search of a birdie after getting six chances yesterday. They eluded my scorecard as if the flat blade was warped.

• @alanashley is the winner of the second episode of Thursdays are Trivial. Just for recognizing Telegraph Road by Dire Straits, he takes home a sweet VA is for Lovers bumper sticker and some homemade butter from Williamsburg. Spread it thick Alan! There's more where that came from.
• H/T to @amymengel for some extra knowledge on the tune. And three demerits for @BPMackie for guessing Air Supply.
• A sneak peek at next week's category: Libations on Location. Sounds like cash values have doubled.
• Check the blog roll to the right for updated posts from other, more dedicated writers. But since this post is Twitter heavy, here's one I like from Stuff of Legend.

And, you know what I've been missing...??

I'm sure you have too.

Playing for Pruitt

Saw this on ESPN last night. Noticed the Georgia G on the camo-visor right away of course. Inspirational video from Frankie Gay, the father of a slain soldier who had planned to play in the World Series of Poker.

I wish for you pocket Aces throughout Mr. Gay. God bless!

Tuesday Headers

Some Dawg bites to add to your bowl this afternoon:

• Kickoff for the WLOCP is now official.
• Tompkins is kicking some international butt.
• Today's biggest headline from @MikeInValdosta via Chevy Chase: Jacko's still dead.
• PWD has some football headlines. In the comments section though, some bad news. Fair warning.
• In the Senator's office, the BCS debate rages on. Mike weighs in here.
• As news broke of Frank Ros being honored with the Bill Hartman award, Exhile wondered who had won it the past five years. I'll try to research it and add it as an update later.
• While Hale sleeps one off, he has a couple video blogs up: Israel Troupe Joe Cox
• And in the wake of Andy Roddick's near perfect performance during the Wimbledon fortnight, Dan Magill looks back on what might have been for Diaz's netters.

• 
  

Monday's Meatloaf - Road Rage on Peachtree

My legs are so sore, it's a good thing I don't use them to type. But I'm glad I was as far back from Ethiopia's Tadese Tola as possible. That dude really wanted the fourth place finish on the Fourth; willing to elbow Kenyan Boaz Cheboiywo in order to get it.

Sure...I got a couple chicken wings from an old lady at the third water station and was tripped by a pre-teen racer dead set on a blast from a Buckhead denizen's hose. But that all comes with the territory when you're seeded with the 9's.

It's a free-for-all back there with Howard's Heroes. Some other thoughts:

• Reading from the pre-race instruction booklet..."walkers and slower runners stay to the right". Hmmmm...that would be convenient, seeing as I left my steering wheel in the car!! If you're a South Carolina graduate and couldn't read the instructions...well, bless your heart.
• To all you spin doctors who were out on the sidewalks pumping out your hip and your hop at ridiculous decibels...no thanks sir. I only remove the ear buds for live music. Big H/T to Strato Geezer, Lawmen and the other bands for smokin' the frets old school.
• Big shout-out to St. Phillip's for the HolyWater. As refreshing as a foot bath from Jesus himself!
• I'm not sure what FurBus is, but seeing grown and very hairy men run around in banana hammocks is enough to make me run a little faster. Thanks!
• Darren the Intern...the playlist you created was perfect. Every song provided the right pace for my Nike's to follow. It's that type of attention to detail that will take you far in this company son.
• Thanks to Heath and Coca-Cola for the sponsorship. I had no problem yelling PEPSI SUCKS!! at the top of my lungs every half-mile. And I promise not to drink a Mountain Dew for at least another week.
• For those servicemen and women I didn't thank personally Saturday, your dedication is our inspiration. Thank you!
• And at the finish line, why not meet tired, thirsty runners with bottled water that has been cozy with some ICE...and not just sitting on a truck for three days and then baking in the sun for three hours?

Just sayin...

Ladies and Gentlemen...your ingredients:

• Roughing the Kicker has a great post in the wake of an epic Wimbledon battle. Rex is right, as a fan it's a joy to see the raw emotion come out when the championship trophy goes from within grasp to tightly clutched. Then he weighs in on the Sam Keller case. I knew Jacko had done some skin lightening...not sure how I feel about a former Dawg kicker doing that though...??
• Lock the liquor cabinet and hide the beer, MikeInValdosta is failing laptop sobriety tests now over at Dawg Bloggin Under the Influence. He's also waging war on the color orange.
• Since Mike mentioned Charley Trippi (what...you didn't read it? I don't create these links for improved cardio health you know?), head on over to Bubba n' Earl's where they're at 62.
• Over at Hey Jenny Slater, Doug was celebrating the Fourth bikini style.....that shouldn't dissuade you from following the link. It's not a picture of him...
• If you woke up yesterday tired of fireworks, but hungry for some interesting questions related to the upcoming season...our distinguished Senator had ya covered.

Gonna be some lighter than normal posting this week. Tryna work a little before we head up to InLawVille. I guess I'll get a first hand taste of what it's like to be Exhile for a while. Gonna try to get a mid-week discussion topic post up. And of course, there will be this week's episode of Thursdays are Trivial...the event that is sweeping the nation, but ignoring the garage.

Remember you'll need to be an @BernieDawg follower on Twitter to play. If you're an evolutionary reject struggling in the techno world, I provided a BDB version of Twitter for HillBillies this weekend.

If it can bring Bernie a little closer to an AJC columnist, it can't be all bad. Give it a whirl. Then you better get to researching. This week...the training wheels are off.

Mix em up well Reader. Let them get to know each other and then bake at 400 for just under an hour. But beware of psychotic Ethiopians throwin' elbows at the lunch table.

Bernie

Twitter Made Twerrific

A few days ago the debut of Thursdays are Trivial sponsored by BDB swept the nation. The question was HOT, the response was enough to fry servers across America...and the prizes were legendary. But as always, Bernie has his pulse on his readership. Some of you are still afraid to take the reins of Twitter and ride off into the Twittersphere.

I feel ya. I once was reluctant to embrace Facebook. I was even more reluctant to put my arms around something called Twitter. But I've grown into quite the Twit. If you're not signed up yet, but are mildly interested...read on. You could learn from my mistakes.

If FB is about social networking on a wide scale, Twitter is about quick interactions. Interactions that could grow if needed, but brief and to the point.

Let's start with some definitions:

1. Tweet - an update you send out that anyone who is following you can see; pretty much the same as a FB status update, but limited to 140 characters...choose carefully and learn to abbreviate when necessary.
2. ReTweet - an update that someone has decided to forward, usually because they like it and think it relevant enough for their own followers to read...or it just contained a picture or cool update that the person wants to stake a claim to. Symbiosis meets social networking.
3. Follower - someone who has decided you are cool enough that they would like to check out your updates on a regular basis. When your first person follows you, don't get all David Koresh up in here...keep it real. More I wanna know more...and less Branch Davidian Kool-Aid.
4. UnFollow - kind of like getting dumped before prom, but with a lot more ambiguity.
5. Following - the people you choose to include in the updates you view; any update your following posts, you can see. I call it the Al Gore Magic of the internets!
6. Tag - a word or phrase preceded by a # is a tag that denotes a specific topic; if I tag the word Dawgs in a Tweet, it can be pulled up in a search or listed under Trending Topics; it also shows your Following topics you tend to Tweet about.
7. DMs - direct messages between you and one other person in your following; no one else can see this message unless you work in a cubicle in the center of an office floor.

Hey look everybody! Frank's flirting online with some chick named @BerthasBarcoLounger...

There's a lot more, but that's prolly enuf for now. Jus get used 2 short'n yur sentces so they fit...

Lastly, some tips to make Twitter mo' better:

• The best way to make Twitter useful to you is to be careful who you follow. Just because you are being followed by someone, doesn't mean you have to follow them back. When you receive a notice that someone is following you, check their followers and their updates. If you don't make it past the first handful....don't bother reciprocating.
• Beware of Spammers...especially chicks who want you to join some subscription site to view their pics. Twitter does a fair job of "suspending" these vixens, but learn from @BPMackie's mistake...they just want your clicks...not your raw sex appeal.
• If you like it after a week, download a Twitter crackpipe. I was mildly amused by twitter for a couple months...until I was advised to use TweetDeck. It truly is like Twitter on methamphetamines. Organizes Tweets into groups (like Dawgs, Media, ...Vixens..??) and has quick buttons to shrink tweets to under 140, shrink links, and add pics or tags.
• There are a number of these crackpipes. If you have a smartphone, many are available as apps there as well. Ask somone who uses the same phone/service as you and go from there.
• Be careful adding celebs, athletes to your following. Some are imposters living the good life vicariously through Twitter. No...@BernieDawg does not consider himself a celeb....yet. Afterall, not everyone can have @champbailey following them.

Just Sayin'...

Whether you're using it to network or just to occupy a few minutes of your time each day, Twitter can fit the bill. I don't always have nice things to say about @MarkBradleyAJC, but on Saturday he found a really useful way to implement Twitter into an old form of communication.

Simple. Easy. Quick.

Twitter.

God Bless the USA

Hey Reader. Darren the Intern here. Bernie's out taking a casual jog along Peachtree before he spends some quality time with the family and the grill. As he was lacing up his kicks, he asked me to post a couple gems.

First, PapaBernie shares a video by Uncle Jay, who explains the news in his usual unique form.

And this one from AllProDad is sure to remind you of not just the sacrifices our servicemen and women make each day, but also the hardships endured by the families left behind. I'm quite sure a Jonas Brothers concert can't make up for over a year of missing your dad, but I bet Hannah Myers was smiling the whole time.

Welcome Home Master Sgt. Joseph Myers

It's a great country Reader. Now go out and eat your weight in grilled meat and set off some fireworks before you fall into a grill-induced stupor.

H A P P Y F O U R T H of J U L Y ! ! !