Erk and the legend of "Mambo Gook"

Erk Russell always had a way with communication. Otherwise "GATA!" would've never been born from GTAA, Georgia Tech Athletic Association. Or whatever the hell.

So when the lesson turned to gap integrity, Erk used this story of Mambo Gook to communicate the importance of being where you're supposed to be, doing what you're supposed to be doing. "If you think you're coming my way, that's the wrong hole brother, because you ain't gonna make nothin' here."

So, with that in mind...as promised.

The "Mambo Gook" story goes like this: A young Georgia Tech engineering graduate had been working in the oil fields of Saudi Arabia for around six months. He was about to go stark raving mad because the only women that he had seen in Arabia were those dressed in the long gowns with the veils covering their faces. The women were not very friendly at all. As a matter of fact, he hadn't spoken to one since he had been working there.

He had been used to the feminine pulchritude of Peachtree Street in Atlanta and missed that scenery and his feminine companionship more than anything else. As he was sitting in the little bar at the golf course there in Saudi Arabia, he happened to be seated next to one of the local sheiks.

This particular sheik had spent some time in the United States and conversed with the young engineer as best he could with the little English he could speak. As they sipped on their drinks the young engineer expressed to the sheik that he liked everything fine, except he really missed the feminine companionship that he once enjoyed back in Atlanta. The sheik could get enough out of the conversation to understand what the young man meant. He promised the engineer that he would have, from his harem, one of his wives waiting for him when he got off from work the following afternoon.

Well, the young engineer hustled and worked through the day. He could hardly wait until quitting time. As he approached his tent, he saw this woman standing out front with her long gowns and veil. He figured that she knew why she was there and he surely knew why she was there, so he wouldn't waste any time. He picked her up right there at the tent flap, rushed her inside, threw her down on the cot and commenced to making wild, passionate love to the woman. Immediately she began to shout, "Mambo Gook," "Mambo Gook." She repeated that over and over and over again. The young engineer figured this was an Arabian expression of ecstasy.

Well, it didn't take too long for the young man to finish the first round and as soon as he relaxed his grasp, the woman still screaming, "Mambo Gook," ran through the tent flap and disappeared across the desert, continuing to scream, "Mambo Gook."

The next day the young engineer and the local sheik had made arrangements to play golf and the young engineer wanted a chance to thank the sheik for his courtesy of having the woman there. As they played the first hole, the sheik hit a magnificent shot, straight to the green, the ball hit, bounced and rolled right into the cup. It was a great golf shot and the young engineer wanted to express the greatness of that shot with something more than the usual, "Nice shot," or, "Great shot." The thought of the Arabian expression of ecstasy occurred to him, and he said, "Mambo Gook, sheik, Mambo Gook.".

The sheik turned to him, looked at him with amazement and said, "What do you mean, wrong hole?"

-  pages 50-51, from Erk: Football, Fans and Friends 

Glad one of our Damn Good Dawgs relayed this story to our defense earlier this month. It will prove useful later today, and the rest of the Saturdays that follow.

Go Dawgs!

Friday Misery - Are you Fab Fly Freddie Red-Y?

I am not superstitious. I'm not. But I'm also a "if it ain't broke, leave the wrench in the tool bag" kinda guy. And you know what worked in 2003?

Fab Fly Freddie checking his rearview.

That red speck, that miniscule Georgia red pixel in the background is me sitting in a sea of orange. I remember how fast Gibson ran away from me (and the defensive back) and that I was the only one in my section that seemed excited about it. To stand amid a sea of indifference as the lone voice of reason is an intoxicating feeling. Am I right?

I also remember Dad cursing David Pollack. Cursing the line that couldn't block him. Cursing the coaches that couldn't coach the line that couldn't block him. And then I remember post-gating for a bit, and filing in line leaving campus behind one of the kids they'd put on an island to defend Charlie Whitehurst against one of college football's greatest pass rushers ever.

"Dad, you see that one play where I kept him back? You see that one?"

That's funny because it's pitiful. Plus, I think it was the one play Pollack sat out. Regardless, tomorrow I'll be sitting in the same section. Not because I'm superstitious. But because it's the only ticket I could get that's what Dawgs do on the road. Get in the stadium and cheer their gotdamn head off!

Ok, now let's play...what does Bernie not give a shit about?

First, excuses. I do not fairly give a shit that our defense is young. Our defense last year sucked, bottom line. Do y'all want them back, with their one eye on Mel Kiper's pen and the other on the sideline to see if they can sit this play out? They were a series of fits and starts that couldn't stop the runs with a handful of Imodium and a bath plug. Don't sell these new guys short just because they haven't started many games. They're not an excuse, they're our opportunity to prove Georgia Bulldogs defense is better than 2012. They're my guys. They're yours too.

I also don't give a shit about where Gameday is. Some of y'all are a little too obsessed with Kirk's highlights. It's gotten more than awkward. If they wanna come watch me tailgate, sobeit. But fretting over our record while they're on the same campus is weak sauce. It's August hoss. Put your big boy britches on. Let em dress like clowns.

Third. Brent Venables in year two. You know what Brent Venables in year two has never tackled? Todd Damn Gurley. In any year. You know what Brent Venables in year two can't catch? The dust that Keith Marshall kicks up off the turf. Big 12 theories might work in ACC country. But as we proved last year, Grown Man Football is the college football axiom that will never be unproven.

Fourth. Passing the football. RUN. THE. DAMN. BALL. Forever. Then turn around and RUN. IT. BACK.

And last, anything in the world other than this:

If that alone doesn't get your Georgia Red blood pumping a little faster, then I do not know you sir. And I do not care to either.

Back to the defense to close this thing out. I have it on good authority that they've been told the story of Mambogook. If you're not familiar with this tale of Georgia Bulldog football lore, I'll find a moment to relay it to you before kickoff. My point is this: They'll be ready. And unlike 2012, they'll also be hungry.

So stop your fretting over their over-hyped offense. Ease off the ledge. Take my hand and trust in this. We have Gurley. They don't. We have history on our side. They don't. We have a coach that is treating this as a business trip and not a pre-season scrimmage. They don't. It's not a "one-all, end-all deal". Right Dabo? You always wanted a spring game with Dawgs. Well, you better wear your cup tomorrow son. You're getting that and more.

To quote the man himself: "This is the gameplan. We have no alternate plan." See y'all in Clemson. Stick a fork in the off season. Real football is here!

Buttchuggers have 5th ugliest uniform

via (h/t AHD)

It should make you feel like a Prius, bitch!

Flashback: 1985's return to Death Valley

Entire game here, uploaded by Dawg19. It was Dooley's last win over the Tigers. And even though they came in as a seven point underdog, the Georgia Bulldogs once again rose to the occasion and pulled out of town with a victory. Enjoy!

Midseason form, in an orange jersey

You should watch this all the way through. He's going to say some things that will get your dander up for sure. But if you've never been to Auburn with a lake, this is the intensity level you'll experience Saturday night. All the way down to his Sammy Watkins shuffle.

(Also, Missouri fans...THIS, is SEC ready.)

h/t Robert

Ski Clemson y'all, plus a "call" to arms

A picture similar to this one used to hang in my dad's office. (Except it had a guy skiing over a field of manure.) He was the lone IPTAYer among mostly Dawg colleagues during the series' heyday back in Athens. 

Also, wanted to send out an inquiry for anyone out there that might be interested. For years Jim from Duluth did the Hotline Report, a recap of the call in show done every Monday night during the season with Coach Richt. I took over a couple years ago and Life will not allow me to continue. I hate to see this thing go though so I wanted to use a little space here to ask if there are any volunteers. It basically consists of taking notes of the call in show (Mondays, 8pm) and submitting them for everyone else in the DawgNation to read. Especially those Dawgs in exile that are outside of the airwaves. And for bloggers like me.

Anyway, if you're interested please let me know (berniedawg AT gmail). It doesn't pay anything, except for fame. You'd be a hero for sure. There'd likely be a documentary made about you later in life that Scott Howard narrates. So, you're welcome for that.

Clemson's "landmark win" is food for thought

12 carries for 124 yards and 2 touchdowns

Just keep that stat line in mind as you read this...

I know I keep coming back to it, but I really hope Richt's staff watched the Chick-Fil-A Bowl with fidelity to prep for Clemson. Because only Les could manage to out Clemson Dabo.

Before he ran for re-election into the LSU backfield, Jeremy Hill was trampling through the Clemson defense in Atlanta like lil' Billy Tecumseh Sherman. He averaged over 10 yards per carry. The Clemsoning had commenced because they had no answer for the freshman tailback the entire game. Well, most of it.

Because there was one defender Hill could not elude - Leslie Edwin Miles. After a modest first half (5 carries 37 yards), Hill broke loose in the third quarter for 87 yards on just 7 carries. That helped LSU build a 24-13 lead going into the fourth quarter. It seemed insurmountable and many viewers turned the tv to get ready for the ball drop at midnight.

Instead, Hill played decoy the rest of the game and touched the ball exactly zero times in the final stanza. The drive chart for LSU in the fourth includes one rush, five passes, two three and outs.

Said Miles after the game:

"Tajh Boyd was phenomenal. I did not expect the heroic, if you will, efforts that he had."

LSU fans had to be wondering why they had even given Boyd the chance. A quarterback can't be heroic from the sideline while watching his teammates play defense. Meanwhile Dabo was calling it a "landmark win".

Perhaps that's exactly what it was. Gift wrapped by the Mad Hatter himself. And perhaps too much of my confidence in Georgia with this opener stems from this one game. LSU's defense was pretty good last season and had a lot of experience going into the bowl game. Yet still they gave up a lot of yards to Clemson. But they made a couple plays (like the opening run by Watkins to force a fumble and get their offense great field position) and did a decent job of forcing the Tigers into long yardage (Clemson was 8-18 in third down conversions).

So again, if our coaches studied this game like I think they did, they have to see that you can't give Chad Morris and Tajh Boyd 100 plays Saturday night. And by God, YOU HAVE TO RUN THE DAMN BALL!!

A casual look back, with Vince Dooley

If you haven't seen this already, I thought it was really well done. You get a glimpse of the legendary coach in his natural "habitat", reflecting on the greatest play in Georgia football history.

Erk Russell and the hereafter

Two more days. Use today to get a BIG neck and run a BIG mile!

"Anyone who is not a Double Dawg, leave the room now."

I guess it was a matter of time. I've typed my peace. Now it's Hitler's turn.

(h/t Sweetspot02)