Saturday, April 3, 2010

Taxi Cab Confessions, part dos


After today's scrimmage, Coach Richt said that he would have a comment on Monday in regards to the now infamous taxi cab incident from last weekend.

Richt says he'll have a comment Monday on the Taxi incident. "things I'd like to say about it, but I'll wait til Monday."
Just a thought...if I were a coach who had some players that needed to be held accountable for their actions, I'd be itching for the right opportunity and moment to provide that for them. However, if I were a coach who had a group of players wrongly identified I'd be chomping at the bit to defend them.

Since we have some time, let's collect some more thoughts to marinate:
  • Where are the names?
  • As I peruse the roster, there's only two "Dereks": Derrick Lott and Derek Rich. (Rich is white, fwiw)
  • Derrick Lott's Facebook updates give no hints of anything out of the ordinary last week, other than him losing his phone.
  • Whether it was football players or not, I'd love to hear the other side of this story. There's plenty missing from that report.
  • I mean, you don't just climb into a van and call a dude a white racist for nothing without having some serious issues...like DSM IV type issues.
Understand me, I'm not making excuses. Whoever is guilty of battery and terroristic threats needs to appear before a judge in handcuffs and a jumpsuit. But there's a good chance the rest of the people in the van weren't coming from Palm Sunday service at their church at that time of day. 

Let's get the full story. Then let's put this whole thing in the taxi's rear view mirror.

ch, ch, ch, CHANGES...

Just gonna have to be a different man...

This is just my second spring as a blogger, but I've weathered plenty as a fan. And as fans we've been subjected to much of the same off-season talk as in years past re: off-season workouts, attitude, great position changes, coaches with renewed enthusiasm, players up for the competition.

So on and so on....rinse, repeat.

But the true Dawg fan recognizes something different this spring. Hale outlined several yesterday

I won't regurgitate them all. I hope you've already read them. But I will give a shout-out to the one that most excited me: the emphasis on reducing penalties.

Being one of the most penalized teams in college football is embarrassing to me. Winning in the SEC takes a lot of things, and one of them is mental discipline. Careless penalties in every game of the season shows a serious lack of any discipline. If we want to gain any of those hidden yards, we've got to get rid of the unnecessary roughness, the false starts, offsides....the overall WTFs...???

And I'll end with this thought: perhaps the biggest change this off-season is one within the head coach himself. From recent readings I gather he's not micro-managing, yet he still has that finger on the pulse. From hearing certain quotes and observing certain changes, my take is that some of the coaches who were let go indeed had more than a negative impact on production.


Duh!

Case in point -new LBs Coach Belin wants better tackling and is obviously taking a hands on role there, but he also has taken the muzzle off of the Georgia place kickers. It seems to me like the right emphasis is being placed in the right places. If Fabris spent a moment concerning himself about what the Dawgs' kickers were saying in front of a microphone it was a moment too much.

And if CMR felt any need to oversee what was going on defensively, it was bordering on a waste of time for the head guy. I like the idea of him keeping his coaches and players accountable much more than tending to several different fires around Woodruff....and Sanford.

Erin Andrews Continues to Attract the ScumBags


I mean...really??
The emails at first were sexual, but the most recent were explicitly violent and "threatened Erin with murder."
The first time I saw Erin Andrews in person was actually at Historic Mark Richt Field when the nerds were playing the Hokies. It was a Thursday night of course. She was striking, much more interesting than the game.

But I don't get the fascination with her. First of all (for me at least), she's a gator. That's a deal breaker. One that can not be negotiated.

But beyond that I still don't see it. She's attractive. Tall. Blond. But gets way too much attention. Which begs the question...

When does the mutha of all networks accept some responsibility for creating this problem to begin with? 

And for that matter...Ms. Andrews herself.
Andrews has no plans of quitting the show (Dancing With the Stars). ..."She's not the type to be easily threatened..."
Great. But the fact of the matter is that ESPN/ABC loves to put her in front of the camera, and not just from the sidelines of the gridiron. They do so to improve ratings, add some sex appeal to a television product that already begs the attention of a prime demographic.

Maybe it's just because I'm raising two daughters...but what's the end game here? When does a television network draw the line? And when does a tv journalist decide enough is enough?

Friday, April 2, 2010

Taxi Cab Confessions


If there's one thing the Dawg Nation hates it's a cloud of doubt over Butts-Mehre.

Coach Richt says he's aware and is resisting the wrong move of reacting too soon. Kudos to him...and let's all fall in line.

The article doesn't sound good. But as you've probably noticed, the names were missing. The report says four black men got into the cab and started making trouble. To label them as football players is either slanderous...or accurate. Careful...calculated...speculated...

? ? ? ? ?

As the investigation(s) unfold, we may know more. It sounds from the report like there were plenty of witnesses to interview. If the story plays out as reported, there should be plenty of hell to pay, both in the locker room and on the message boards. If the story is inaccurate...well, the angst will reach a fever-pitch.

Cuz like me, right now you're probably pissed. Just not sure at who...


**Updated** 
Some morning links from the light of day:

Brantley Commits to be a Dawg


Just as the ink dried on the Donte Williams' commit, Coach Fox now has Sherrard Brantley on board. Brantley will be a JUCO transfer, but is from Dublin originally.

Brantley can flat out shoot the rock, as PWD outlined just yesterday. He'll not only fill the shoes of McPhee beyond the arc, he gives the coaching staff some much needed flexibility in the backcourt. Flexibility we didn't have this past season.


Surely most everyone took notice of the changes on the hardcourt this season. Even though the season is over, Coach Fox isn't done riding the wave of momentum.

Maybe Polee can make it a trifecta...??

Trivial Update - Mackie Knows Campo


ThursdaysRTrivial ep. 39 is coming up after this PSA: E*Trade is for milkaholics.

#ThursdaysRTrivial episode 39 “Fuh….fuh…fuh….Foolin!” Happy April Fools Day Tweeps! And welcome to the weekly Twivia show that always brings more showers than flowers. REPLY back your answer for a chance at a fabulous prize. What AJC commenter will forever live in glorious infamy for his (her...??) efforts one year ago today?

Knowing this would be a difficult one to tweet in on, I decided to provide a few hints every 30 minutes or so...
  • Hint no. 1: this guy's definitely not on Terence Moore's Christmas card list.
  • Hint no. 2: he supposedly is 12 yrs old and wants a bike.
  • Hint no. 3: at first he seemed really inspired by Moore's writing. But his dad is definitely not a fan.
It's been a while since Mackie had thrown on a pair of pants and graced the limelight of TrT, 16 episodes to be exact. But give the kid credit, he comes up big on the difficult ones.

For recognizing a Mike Campo reference after he reads a few, Mackie gets a beautiful bright red shiny Schwinn. Now as he rides to work with the wind in his hair...

Well, he can feel the wind at least. Good job Mack.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Terence Moore, On the Record...with Willard


Never one to shy away from any type of attention, Terence Moore agreed to sit down with our very own Willard...albeit under the guise of wanting to learn more about developing the craft of writing. Dressed to the nines in a Ken Griffey Jr Mariners jersey, a brightly feathered cap and flip-flops, Moore seemed at ease, relaxed.

At least until Willard opened his mouth.

Willard - Hey Terry. How's it been since the AJC dropped you instead of the white guys?


Moore - I'm not sure I catch your meaning.


Willard - UUUUURRRRRP!! You know....ya got canned Terry.


Moore - I...uh...I...


Willard - Meanwhile Mark and Jeff and Tim and Chip...they're still tapping away on those typewriters. For what it's worth, I disliked your columns only (GULP!) marginally less than theirs....


Moore - Wait...hold on now. I'm now an adjunct media personality for ESPN. It was a shift in career I eagerly embraced....Is that a beer in your koozie?


Willard - Whoa!....no hugs Terry. UUUUURRRRRP!! This is strictttly pluh...pla...pluhtahh...we're just talkin' here dude. And yes....ya like my limited edition camo NRA beer colder thingamajig?


Moore - Look! I don't know who you are or what you're up to, but...


Willard - Simmer down Chief. How 'bout thiiiiis one....Any truth to the actual fact that Mike Campo drove you to run screaming from the building?


Moore - You really need to check your facts son. I retired from writing...


Willard - That's rich ya VickPimp. You tellin' me to fact check. You may have retired (Willard clumsily uses finger quotes)... UUUUURRRRRP!!...from writing. But you quit fact checking about the time the Jeffersons were moving on up. (awkward moment lengthened by an uncomfortable silence) You want a Natty Ice Terry? Helps me find my words...


Moore - No thanks. And off the record, Michael still owes me a dinner.


Willard - BWAHAHAHA!! UUUUURRRRRP!!....if the dog killa owes you a dinner, Griffey will have to work until Obama's daughter is elected to pay you back for all that ink. Not to mention David Justice.


Moore - This interview has nothing to do my craft as a writer does it? You're not interested...


Willard - No Terry. But it has EVERYTHING to do with your crap as a writer.

Moore - We're done here. You have a good day sir.


Willard - You too Craptastic! And Bernie says Happy Mike Campo DayUUUUURRRRRP!!




Well, that went about as expected. Thanks to Willard. Your coupon for beef jerky is in the mail.

Happy Mike Campo Day!!



I know what you're thinking...it's only been a year? Yes, one year. Just three hundred and sixty five days since that intoxicating interaction between a dimwitted journalist and mysterious commenter. That rich and hilarious cyber exchange that will live forever in the wonderous interwebs.

Need a refresher? Lemme bring you back up to snuff...

A year ago Terence Moore still had his full time gig as Chief Craptastic over at the AJC. His charge at the time was to decide who the best candidate was for Georgia's basketball program. He had two names, one was Tubby Smith - former Georgia hoops coach, has enjoyed success everywhere he's been, stuck in seven feet of snow in Minnesota, might just be interested in a warmer clime.

The second name was Craig Robinson - Oregon State coach. Granted Moore did throw out some numbers in Robinson's favor, but most of the reasons why he should be the next Evans hire centered around the fact that he's also Michelle Obama's brother.

Such is the life of being a pimp in print

After the article's (and I use that term loosely...) publication onto the AJC website, a marvelous thing happened...Mike Campo came to life. Born of the imagination of some internet subscriber from the vast darkness and obscurity that is the intertubes. We know not whether this person is an actual AJC subscriber or even if he actually knows how to ride a bike.

But certainly Hale was right when he typed that it's stuff like (this) that the internet was invented for.
Mike Campo 4/1/09, 11:38amMr. Moore, I am 12 years old and love reading your articles. I think they are great! Please keep writing and inspiring the youth like me to write!
Chief Craptastic 4/1/09, 11:48am - Mike Campo - Thanks for the kind words. Since you’re 12 years old, I’m sure you’ll change your mind several times in regards to what you want to do in life. But keep studying hard in general, and I’m glad you enjoy writing. The more you write, the more you’ll enjoy it, and the more you’ll develop your craft. Having the ability (and the will) to write effectively will help you in whatever you decide to do. So, Mike, keep listening to your parents and to your teachers, and you’ll be just fine. 
Mike Campo 4/1/09, 11:51am Just kidding, your writing and opinions suck 
Chief Craptastic 4/1/09, 11:51-12:02pm - silence....
Mike Campo 4/1/09, 12:02pmSorry, my dad typed that. He doesn’t like you and says you are racist. i don’t know what that means. he want’s me to ask you when you are moving to another state? He says he’ll buy me a new bike if you go. Please hurry up and move far away.  

Pure. Comedy. Gold.

The fact that Moore even advises someone on how to develop their craft of writing is enough to make most keel over laughing their asses off. Surely even Mike Campo didn't expect the gag to go that well. If you want to relive the entire moment or if you had the misfortune of missing it altogether, you can drink in the entire goblet full of awesomeness by clicking here. I assure you that the hilarity is as ripe today as it was a mere year ago.

To give this first anniversary it's proper due, I was able to procure an interview with the idiot named Terence....a task Willard was more than ready for. Check back later for that. 

But for now, thank you Mike Campo. Thank you for your cunning, your cleverness and your undetectable guise of pre-teendom. Hope that bike came with a personalized plate to put under the seat...FOOL'd YA!!

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

A Lethal Cocktail - Michael Adams and the NCAA


There's suddenly a great big spotlight on the large elephant in UGAs room. It's not that UGA alumni and fans have always refused to discuss the topic of Is Michael Adams the actual devil? It's more like we just prefer to pretend he's not really there. He'll come out of his North Campus hole every so often to make an ass out of someone and then he slithers away.

Unfortunately, having seen him in person I can attest to the fact that he does indeed exist.

But will he exist much longer in Athens? We've known for awhile that he's a leading candidate to replace Myles Brand as NCAA Chief Dictator. Brand left a modest legacy of academic improvements that evidently Adams would like to ruin.

That's just how he rolls....

Back in my day we had Charles Knapp as UGA President. I never saw him play kickball, but I bet he didn't kick like a girl getting ready to promote from kindergarten. No, the main criticism against Knapp was that he didn't do enough. Boy, we didn't know how good we had it back then. Adams wakes up each day to crush souls and find new and more malevolent ways to wield his massive ego. He's hated by a majority of the faculty, the only alumni that don't despise him are the ones he's wined and dined on the private jet he used to use like a Winnebago, he doesn't like cocktail parties and let's see...what else...

Oh yeh! He stabbed Coach Dooley in the back...several times...publicly.

At this point if I were to pull back the curtain the Board of Regents hides behind, I wouldn't be surprised if I found Adams there holding a gun in one hand and an unfiltered Camel in the other. The man spends cash extravagantly like there's no tomorrow then raves about the influx of donations to the University, most of which he has nothing to do with. If I were to hunker down at the foot of the arch and miraculously find a cure for cancer, this jackhole would not only take all the credit but would be sure to do so within earshot of the Action News van.

The truth is, I don't know if Prez Adams will be anointed NCAA King. It's entirely possible he's lined the right pockets and slapped the right backs. We all know that the NCAA isn't a perfect organization and that it likely never will be. Those of us in and around Athens also know Michael Adams isn't the right choice to succeed Brand. Mixing that amount of power with his stature of indignity is a lethal cocktail, pardon the pun.

But it'd be nice if all this sudden national attention would also awaken the powers that be. Maybe someone would find it within themselves to backstab the backstabber...



Some other related readings of interest:




Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Home Sweet Home...Athens


Crai S Bower has a piece up on authentic college towns that speaks very highly of Athens (h/t Cojones). It likely won't tell you anything you don't already know about our favorite city, but it's worth a read just to compare Athens to the other cities on his list. As Cojones pointed out, no other SEC stops make the cut.

In fact, it becomes clear that Bower is trying to select a college town from nearly every area of the US. For 17 year olds looking to further their education in a warm climate with a great music scene, Athens is beyond intriguing. Hopefully, it's especially intriguing to those 17 year olds who also have an innate ability to produce touchdowns on Saturdays....

Being an Athens native, I knew exactly what I was getting when I decided North Campus was where I wanted to take my collegiate naps. For my wife, it was to get someplace far away (but not too far) from home that was also warm. What first drew you to the Classic City? 

And what brings you back?


Cats Declawed


By the time KenYucky finished wetting their oversized gym shorts Saturday night, I had long been reminded of the hazards of wagering on the performances of 18 year olds. I'm sure a harder reality has set in up in Lexington, where suddenly their basketball roster is ready to make a legitimate step towards being professionals.


Someone's going to have to run the point next season....??? Somebody nail Crapalari's cheap loafer to Rupp's hardwood!! Has anyone seen the bluegrass checkbook?

That, and there will be some decorating changes perhaps...



As Captain Annoying tweeted, not real sure why the Sea of Blue is so upset....

Monday, March 29, 2010

Monday's Meatloaf - Method to the Madness



In about a week, I'll take a little vacation. And then I'll return to work and regular life refreshed, relaxed...you know, I'll act like I've been there before.
Corch Slurban Meyers on the other hand is like a fish outta water coming back from his vacay. And while some argue that he needs more time with his feet propped up, I would contend that this is just his normal method of operating. It's not easy running college football's largest organized crime ring, pretending to be a family man, controlling his own hypertension and maintaining the world's worst crew cut.

It takes a jackhole to call some timeouts.
It might even be fair to say that within 15 seconds of his (internal) alarm clock going off, he's already flipped a quarter to see if he's a real prick for the day or just a plain asshole. One day he's retired. The next, just taking a brief sabbatical. One day he's ripping a journalist for doing his job, the next he's apologizing for being the biggest d-bag on video since a man turned forty. One day he's proclaiming Timmy Tebow to be the best pair of hands in the Phillipines, the next he's dodging phone calls from his former QB.

He's the head corch of the F U gators ladies and gents. Whaddya expect?


Today's Ingredients

Yup...Jack's no longer back. So we'll have to find someone else to cover ours.

I'll admit I was a little late jumping onboard the 24 action drama. Once I did I found the best way to watch it was using the DVD box sets. I didn't have to wait a week for my pulse to come down to a normal rate of speed before feeding the frenzy all over again.

But something's been wrong the last couple seasons. I even stopped watching the current season altogether; a hotshot blawgger has to make concessions you know. That new chick agent just rubbed me the wrong way. Too much melodrama for a show that used to tie annoying people to chairs and stuff a grenade in their mouth. Or simply just blow crap up.

Surely all 24 viewers can agree that Jack just needs a vacation too. Let's just hope he doesn't lip the same coin that Slurban's been using. For you Reader, enjoy this plateful. 

One forkful at a time please.


Bernie


** Update - I forgot an ingredient....Remember, Thursday is a very special day in low journalistic standards. Come back and we'll celebrate together. **