Train Wrecks and Rope Belts...a match made in heaven

I've never actually seen a train wreck as it happened. I guess I've seen pictures of one after the fact; a mixture of tragedy and chaos. 

But the one that is happening north of us in Nutsville is really, REALLY hard to take your eyes away from for more than 12 hours. KiffyBaby is writing checks his offensive personnel will not be able to cash.

I keep getting this mental picture of a schoolyard where four big kids are playing and one little brat with a mouth the size of his Diddy's resume is darting around to give each kid more than his fair share of annoyance.

At the time I get the image, the schoolyard is well supervised. The teachers let the brat know when he's crossed the line too far, but it does little to shut the trap. And yet the bigger kids' resolve (albeit tested) grows steadfastly.

Eventually school will let out. The rules will change. And so will the score. Hillbilllys beware: enjoy your coach's mouth while it's not swollen and bloodied.

Friday's Feedbag

• As I clocked into ESPNnews last night I was thrilled to see that there was some NCAAF news coming, right after it cycled through MLB and NASCAR. But I was surprised when the news was that CMR had defended his staff's in-state recruiting practices against KiffyBaby's mindless regurgitation about Marlon Brown's grandmother.
• Is that really news? I had listened to the audio earlier in the day and had read the AJC article covering it. What it amounted to was basically a no comment from a coach taking the high road. Garner went a little more in depth, but it was basically the representatives of an esteemed program not stooping down to the level of the latest circus in town.
• The Mutha of all networks seems a little too enamored with the cotton candy coming out of Philmer's replacement.
• I'll give ya another warning: if you're not clicking over to Jeff Owens' blog daily, you're just an idiot. Get it together, the off-season's no time to get lazy. He's mixing in some great Q&A's with some mindblowing editorials. It all adds up to a vivid look into the life of the student-athletes we spend so much time barking for.
• For some video of 95 talkin' it up, here's Hale's work up.
• You could really sum up the headlines the last few weeks with two words: drugs and Kiffin.
• I'm going to have something a little more in depth on steroids later, but I just can't shake this bewilderment.
• I applaud the possibility of "reinstating" Hammerin' Hank as the HR King. It has been a rare moment of admiration I've had for Bud Selig. But...
• Selig and MLB baseball turn their heads while players stacked and as they come clean there are overtures of possible consequences. MLB cheers heartily and reaps the reward of beefed up regular season HR derbies, then gives a tisk tisk when players get caught in a corner with an empty syringe. Hmmm...
• RidgeDawg over at GeorgiaBulldog.com provided this link earlier this week. It's a great read on Herschel by Joe Posnanski. It's a doosie though, so make sure and carve out a good sized lunch break for it.
• I have to admit I may need to lift my personal strike against reality TV shows and watch Celebrity Apprentice when 34 goes into Trump's board room next month.
• Felton is leaving behind some success. As Chip Towers reports, the former coach made remarkable strides towards cleaning up the team's act in the classroom. Unfortunately, passing grades and classroom attendance didn't translate into Ws on the hardwood. But at least the players we have now are earning their grades.
  
• Speaking of roundball, as the team fights with each other and turnovers take the place of points and assists, undoubtedly the new coach will have an uphill climb. Going o-fer with a bunch of bruised eyes and egos will not make this job appealing to some candidates not named Desperate, excuse me...Knight. 
• These kids need to get it together. As WesterDawg wrote, Hermann and the rest of the staff deserve better as they face personal and professional changes for themselves and their families.
• And what's up with Joaquin Phoenix? Caught a glimpse of him on Letterman. To borrow my wife's favorite quote from The Gladiator, "How do you like me now Meth-head?"
  
• Lastly, for you gentleman readers who have yet to make the plans for tomorrow's smoochie fest, Mackalicious has the hook up...or at least some advice for what NOT to do....no matter how tempting an $80 stuffed and tatt'd up bear might be.

Discussion topic for the weekend, what do you think is worse: Bratastic calling out the brass of the SEC and refusing to take heed or hillbillys thinking he's the best thing since mason jars? Seriously, I hope the distance between lil' Kiff's office and AD Hamilton's (whose name I didn't even know until a few weeks ago...what does that tell you?) isn't far. 

Cuz that carpet is getting worn out.

The King's Quote of the Week:

The Set Up - Chuck and Chernoff were deep in a discussion on steroids and why MLB chooses not to police it and why we don't have a test for HGH yet....

The Quote - "Why can't we test for HGH? I paused live television yesterday. I watched you cook something crispy in the microwave."

As always, it's good to be the King. Have a great weekend reader. BTW - I tried #10 off my Wednesday list. It took less than two minutes and I am happy to report....no orange!

Bernie