Large Outdoor Cocktails Make Video Fun

Let's start with one that was an instant classic. h/t johnnypm427

In case you've run out of reasons why floriDuh sucks, MrBigDawg54 has you covered.

And here's how things stand in Gayturdsville today. h/t JenX

Hopefully we can manage to continue their misery. Cuz that should be their lot in life.

.

Branden Smith...can you spare a nickel?

Branden Smith's "likely" return to action Saturday against the FU Gators is welcome news. Very much welcome, for these reasons...in specific order.

1. Nickel situations. Cuff is still struggling, the change in scheme hasn't helped. By the time things stabilized for the Wildcats Saturday and they stopped hemorrhaging turnovers, they were finally able to pick on #25, consistently. Smith adds much needed depth that will come in handy in Jax against a team that we'll use extra d-backs to defend.
2. Punt return. I was excited about AJ returning punts up until he laid on the turf of Sanford after a brutal hit against Tennessee. No, it wasn't on a punt return. But the flashbacks to the first four games without him were intense. Logan Gray is my preference, then Branden. 
3. Need for speed. I don't know how much we'd use him on offense, but he's the gamechanger we need on the field whenever possible.

This play in itself is enough to put Slurban back into sabbatical mode. He ran a 4.1 that time Mike...

h/t rutlandbaseball1

Mumme Poll - week eight

My ballot for this week:

1. Oregon
2. Auburn
3. TCU
4. Boise State
5. Alabama
6. Missouri
7. Wisconsin
8. Oklahoma
9. Michigan State
10. Stanford

• Shuffling the top teams after the Oklahoma loss wasn't too hard, but deciding who was in what position 6-10 took a little brain stretching.
• As promised, I brought Wisconsin in this week after they held on against Iowa on the road. In short, Bielema had me at fake punt.
• I actually got to watch some of the Michigan State game. They didn't look like a top team for most of the way, but rallied and held on by a thread to my ballot. 
• Stanford is another team I'm not sold on as yet. Wash St scored 28 on them, but 21 of those were in garbage time. I don't see another hurdle on the Cardinal's schedule other than 'Zona. Maybe another team will step and prove themselves more worthy. A team like say..... 
• ...LSU. They were beaten by a sexy and awesome Auburn team, so maybe they have an argument to stay in. But that is just one awful offense. I know they say defense wins championships, but you gotta score at some point, right?
• I moved Boise up. I hate doing that, even though it was just one spot. Deep down I don't think I actually believe that they are better than Alabama. And if Saban's minions go to the bayou and put up a big number on the Hat...the Tide will jump at least one undefeated team.

More SEC Honors

What does...


   2.5 sacks
   3.5 TFLs
   1 Fumble Rec
   1 Forced Fumble
+ 1 PBU               


If your addition is right, it equals SEC Defensive Player of the Week for Georgia's Justin Houston. Well deserved for what was probably his best game as a Dawg.

Monday's Meatloaf - I'll Take Renewed Hope for 500 Alex

So here we are, just where we thought we'd be...right? One-half game out of first place in the SEC East. Does this roller coaster 2010 ride have another radical dip before we reach the pimply kids in the matching theme park suits at the end of the track? 


From ESPNs Chris Low:

After Georgia beat up on Tennessee and Vanderbilt the way the Bulldogs did, it was only natural to say, “It was just Tennessee and Vanderbilt.” But the Bulldogs went on the road Saturday and won comfortably over a Kentucky team that had just beaten South Carolina the week before. That’s three wins in a row now for Mark Richt’s club, and there’s no question the Bulldogs are playing their best football of the season. Richt deserves a ton of credit for keeping this team together during the four-game losing streak. The Bulldogs made some adjustments, tweaked their personnel and got their best player (A.J. Green) back. Now, they’re right there in the middle of the East race again. The complexion of their season could change entirely next weekend in Jacksonville if they can beat Florida. The Bulldogs have scored 40 or more points in their last three games. They’re running the ball better. Their offensive line is playing now like everyone expected when the season began, and this is a team that has a chance to make something of a season that looked like it was in the tank to start this month.

I'm sorry, you were looking
for "What is an afro?"

On the flight back from Boulder I remember clinging to the hope that maybe we could go from last this year to first next season. Could it possibly happen in the same  season? Surely not. Surely the lowlier reptiles will rain on this parade that's been building. Surely Cam Newton will have traded in his former mugshot pose for a Heisman one by the time we reach the Plains. The lamecocks can't be that lame can they?


Of course the real luxury is just being back in the running for a bowl. After enduring a 4 game period of pissiness, I'm just thrilled we made it to Final Jeopardy without a negative balance. We're a longshot, but at least we have an investment in the final month of the season. At least these kids still have much to play for.


So wipe that smug smile of that Canadian mug of yours Trebek. We're all in and got our answers in the form of questions.



Today's Ingredients

This is Floridian sign language for "My shorts are
too long, do you have any scissors?"

• Over at Dawg Food, Danny recaps the night in Lexington. And Kit  weighs in with some pros and cons as well.
• Randy looks at some of the heroes from Saturday night.
• Dawgola runs down the SEC East race and scenarios.
• 15 turnovers for 52 points on the season. A year ago I couldn't even see this tunnel, much less the light at the end of it.
• On the other hand, Quinton points out that we're a ways away from using the term Third and Grantham in a positive way.
• vineyarddawg puts us all on notice, IT'S HATE WEEK!!!
• Streit looks at the Mississippi State Factor in terms of the Georgia-Florida game's recent history. 
• Weiszer points out that floriDuh is attempting to rebound this week and that history is on their side.
• Estes writes that Slurban has used the bye week to determine the way to improve is through scheme and personnel. And I thought it was just better text proofing by grad assistants...
• Bradley looks like he's officially off the Gator Bandwagon.
• Looks like trouble continues to find Quincy's doorstep.
• Spencer Hall takes a honest and rather humorous look at Gene Chizik's rise to SEC stardom.
• Lastly, I must've missed a dawg blogging memo. Exile's gone cruisin' and Mackie's in Aruba. More importantly, how does this gig pay so much more for them?

But don't worry Dawg fans. I'm here this week. For this begins a week of memories in Jax, some good...many bad. Like this one...

I hate Florida. I loathe them in the manner in which I loathe communism, pedophiles and warm beer. The world would be a better place without them. I just don't understand what's taking the rest of the Earth's denizens so long to catch up to our way of thinking.


But let's not let all that get our week off to a poor start. It's gonna be a good one. Let's make the most of it. Let's do the world a favor and smack a gator 'cross the head.


But first, you better eat something. So grab that fork Reader, before a gayturd calls a TO. 




Bernie

Sunday Thoughts on the Blue Grass

Only have time for a couple notes. Then it's time to start packing for a cocktail party.

• Washaun Ealey - whatever confidence he lacked a couple weeks ago has been restored tenfold.
• Sanders Commings - dude is like a turnover magnet in silver britches. And that interception the endzone was a thing of beauty. It's so refreshing to see our DBs turn and play the ball. At least most of them...
• Justin Houston is relentless. He can't be blocked. And if Commings is a turnover magnet, Akeem Dent attracts tackles just as much.
• It won't look pretty in the boxscore, but the defense played very well early and then it was prevention time.
• Not sure what's wrong with Blair Walsh. It may be the same confidence bug that Ealey was suffering from a couple weeks ago. 
• As much as we all wanted to see Aaron Murray torch the UK defense, I just kept thinking of all those FU gators at home watching the game. They got to see so very little of what this offense can do.

That's all I got for now. Talk amongst yourselves.

The Secondary's Shoulders, Coach Lakatos' Voice

Like I said yesterday, today is a big test for our secondary. I think they'll need some help from up front, but you can't expect too many sacks and pressures the way Kentucky unloads the ball so quickly.

But perhaps the voice of Scott Lakatos will still be ringing in the defensive backs' ears...

YOU GAVE UP 380 YARDS!!

Those were the DB coach's words for his players days after the Arkansas game. Now Boykin and Associates face their biggest test since Mallett came to town. If they are able to shoulder the burden today it will be a clear sign that they have stepped forward from the ugly shadow of ol' Willie.

Go Dawgs!

Dawgs in Lexington: a preview

Some points of interest for tomorrow night as we try not to make history having lost two consecutive games to Kentucky for the first time, ever.

Don't make me tweet yo ass!

• Has our defense really turned a corner? We'll know after tomorrow night. Kentucky loves to score as much as they love making bourbon.
• Thank God Randall Cobb can't kick the football (at least I don't think that he can). It's nice to see him take a place on the sideline every now and then. He catches, throws, runs, returns, sells popcorn, conducts the band...even helped sell some tickets this week after calling out the fans.
• Missing Locke would hurt Joker Phillips' club. But Cobb is the bread on which this offense is buttered. The 4th quarter game-winning TD over Carolina was Cobb's 5th of his career. Simply contain him and you're doing better than most.
• And their QB Mike Hartline carved up a good secondary last week, 32/42 for 349 yards, 4 TD and 0 INTs. This is a big test for the Coach Lakatos' unit. I hope the front 7 is able to help out with some pressure.
• You know what the Dawgs haven't done this season of course?...win on the road. In many ways they outplayed Colorado. In SEC road play, we just haven't been able to overcome crucial mistakes. There's no doubt in my mind that we can beat Kentucky. It's just a matter of how focused we can be for 60 minutes in a hostile environment.
• Offensively it's simply about controlling the line of scrimmage and minimizing mistakes. I'm not sure if we can win a shoot-out with Kentucky on the road, but we can certainly put up a good number if we protect the football. If the players packed their razors for the trip, I sincerely hope they come home unused.
• This game worries me a lot; has since August. It may come down to a late FG to win it. If so, it should help that Kentucky seems a bit unsettled at kicker. Could Blair Walsh recreate some magic from '78? Could he break Hap Hines' Commonwealth record? I know I wouldn't bet against him.

As much as it worries me, I'm truly looking forward to this one. Hope we're still barking about it Sunday.

Trivial Update - Hap Hines, the full Monte?

#ThursdaysRTrivial ep 64 is coming up right after this PSA: Hal Mumme...how we miss yo towel eating ass!


#ThursdaysRTrivial episode 64 "Nine Lives, One Joker" It's time for the weekly Twivia show that rarely plays with a full deck. REPLY back your answer for a chance at a fabulous prize. Commonwealth Stadium seats over 67,000 and has been the Wildcat home since 1972. What place kicker holds the distinction of kicking the longest field goal at Commonwealth?


During football season, I generally try to choose a question that has something relevant to the upcoming game. So when I started digging into Kentucky football history it lead me to Commonwealth Stadium, which in turn lead me to two records there painted in Bulldog red.

Buck Belue to Amp Arnold was the longest pass play of 

91 yards on October 25th, 1980.

Hap Hines kicked the longest field goal of 54 yards on October 26th, 1996.

I went with the second one thinking it might be a little more obscure...and desperate to throw off the winner of the past three weeks. Never once did I consider that Hap's record might be confined to collegiate play.

Jenn from La Jolla had other ideas. Her shot in the dark was Monte Merrick, a kicker for Western Kentucky. Had he beaten UK on a last second long one? Or had he played there in a high school game?


The answer to both was no. But Jenn played it up good, at least enough to get me on the google and dial up this Monte kid. Turns out, he's no Hap Hines. But he does have his own website. Either way, it made La Jolla a distant third. Good enough for an official Just Kick'n it with Monte t-shirt...whenever they come out with one.


Paige on the other hand, had the correct answer...just not quite quick enough on the trigger. Her Twitter might be uber, but it's no match for Shan. In it's long and glorious history, TrT has never had a 4 week winner. Ally and Alan came close, but couldn't run their streak to a full month.


As for the fabulous prizes, Paige gets a game used Hal Mumme towel and Shan gets a trophy case...and a racing form from Keeneland. It doesn't appear your luck is gonna run out anytime soon.

Weapons on Offense Not Named AJ

Weiszer does a great job spelling out just what a difference (direct and indirect) AJ Green has meant to the Georgia offense since his return. What's been especially helpful (and refreshing) is that we've had guys ready to make the big play when defenses come out dead set on tightening a grip on #8. For example, against Vandy it was Kris Durham and Washaun Ealey with big gainers.


But the best illustration to the change in the offense the last couple weeks comes towards the end of Weiszer's piece:

Georgia rushed for 124.3 yards per game while Green was suspended and has averaged 185.3 per game since he’s been back. Tight ends Orson Charles and Aron White combined for six catches for 66 yards in the four games without Green and 12 catches for 193 in the three with him.

Certainly Kentucky will come out ready to try and stop AJ Saturday night. I wonder who will be ready for the challenge this time...