Monday's Meatloaf - I Had a Nightmare...of a Dooley in Orange

I had a Nightmare, because we all know there is no content in a HillBilly's character to judge them by. Happy MLK Day Reader. Hope your Dream didn't end in a night sweat.

I grew up across town from Derek Dooley. Our paths rarely crossed save a rec league basketball season. Believe it or not, Dooley's kid had a better crossover than Durham's. But I digress.

I've enjoyed watching Derek coach at LA Tech. His teams are prepared and he coaches with enthusiasm. I really like that and would love to see him succeed...but not no mo.

If the thought of Dawg progeny on a HillBillly sideline hasn't made you sick to your stomach yet, how do like the sound of Coach Dooley as it refers to a Tennessee coach? How do you like the idea of the real Coach Dooley pulling against the Dawgs this October 9th? IN Sanford Stadium? Within mere feet of where he once used to use body english to help Herschel break tackles and FG attempts reach their destination? Does Vince know all of the words to Rocky Top? Will he pet Ol' Smoky while wearing an orange tie?

If that last paragraph made you retch, good. There's no getting around the fact that this hire is good and bad for Georgia. Good in that Derek Dooley is in over his head in Knutsville and works under a man who's days are numbered as Athletic Director. Derek had a decent gig, was his own boss. Then a swindler texted him simply because of his name. He was handed the keys to a Mustang GT with a 4.6 24 valve V8. The only problem, it has four flat tires and not a single can of fix-a-flat.

The Derek Dooley hire is bad for Georgia in that his dad is synonymous with Athens, GA. Coach Dooley bled red and black and now fields questions about the possibilities of wearing orange ties. And why not? As of Friday the former coach and AD now has HillBilly ties within his own family.

I love my children and will do anything to help them succeed. Believe me when I type that to you Reader. I just don't believe they need to wear orange to get there.

Today's Ingredients

• John Isner used the Heineken Open in Aukland as more than a tune up for the ATPs first major. He won the damn thing!
• If you spent the weekend looking for a big red bow to tie around this Grantham hire, I doubt you'd find a better one than this post by the Senator.
• Until the new regime proves itself, we believe we have every right to claim this city. Neuheisel may stoop to KiffyBaby's level, but give the guy props for taking the first shot.
• The GymDogs saw a streak snapped in Tuscaloosa.
• Hale has 5 questions for Coach Richt's program.
• Dean Legge reports that one of Florida's top playmakers really enjoyed his visit ($$) to Athens.
• Scott Lakatos interviewed for the DB position over the weekend. Word is he's the guy. UPDATE: he's officially been named.
• Coach Fox's Dawgs blew two 13 points leads in Starkville, but Exile still sees improvement.
• Drew Butler spent the weekend in Connecticut at the Walter Camp All-American banquet. I thought I'd share a tweet: Dinner has begun at Yale Commons.Colt McCoy, Player of the Year. John Elway, Man of the Year. Drew Butler, most pale player in the room. Know the feeling Drew. (the pale part, not the award banquet part)
• Mackie had a Sunday dilemma that the Vikings put an end to.
• So, Grantham is officially a Dawg after the Vikings proved to be quite brutish Sunday. Now all of a sudden the new guy is scheduling opponents....whoa!

Back to the dream analysis...perhaps the worst part about it is that the Tennessee Dooley is underappreciated. In Athens the name carries with it the sum of all its glorious parts. Urging Lindsay Scott down the sideline. Being carried off the field on shoulders in the Super Dome. The way he discussed at length how each opponents' punter could beat you with his foot. Continuously taking the highest road possible when Adams continuously humiliated him.

Yet those HillBillys are too caught up in being spurned by a egotistical dipshit to truly value the name of their new coach. All of Derek's eloquence in his opening remarks as head coach in Knutsville was lost on most of the suspender clad inbreds as they sifted through the ashes of single coil mattresses.

No worse fate can befall a man than to be surrounded by traitor souls. I wasn't aware Burroughs had ever served any time in the Vol Navy, but I get his drift. Back on point, God bless you Derek Dooley for trying to save a slew of dimwitted mountain folk. You've chosen your fate, win or lose. Unfortunately, coaches' careers tend not to end well in Knutsville. But surely you knew that going in.

As for you, I hope you have a great day Reader. I may have had a nightmare involving an orange tie, but I can spot a holiday when I'm given one. Martin Luther King Jr. preached to love not hate. But I'm sure he never shook hands with Steve Spurrier.

Here's a fork. Unlike Congress, try not to overtax it.

Bernie

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