Monday, October 21, 2013

Monday's Meatloaf - over estimating my mathematical prowess

I feel the need for something light this morning. Let's start with a word problem. No, scratch that. Let's start with the elephant in the blog space and then we'll get to the word problem.

I know I've been short on dishing out the meatloaf lately. To be perfectly honest there's just not enough time. Fall is busy enough and this autumn we have Georgia football on Saturdays and then the 9yo has flag football on Sundays. And their coach is a lot like Goff...pre-Hines Ward.

Scoreboards use math. Our alumni remind me of this all the time.
Anyway, trust me that this regular feature will continue to be a staple here on the blog. And when time permits it'll be back to its weekly self. And I have to add, yesterday when my group of little 7-9 year olds were down five with time for just one play to go the length of the field. We needed a miracle. And that happens to be the name of my little girl's right arm.

She zipped the ball 20 yards and somehow the little guy caught it. Because she had put an extra dose of mustard on it the defense didn't react in time catch him. After all, he'd already outrun their whole team on a beautiful reverse call, if I do say so myself. The Lightning Ninjas win in dramatic fashion!! was supposed to be the AJC headline this morning. Let me know when they finally post it. Now, let's get mathematical.
Ray Goff runs at his school's track every weekday. If Ray runs 5.9 miles each time, estimate how much he runs in a month.
Write down your answer and we'll discuss it at the other end. Or if you really wanna show off your brass ones, put it in the comments now.

Today's Ingredients
- "The crappiest thing about losing that game was wasting Shaq Wiggins' pick six." Blutarsky with the truth bomb.
- Emerson has an in-depth look at Georgia's problems.
- Tyler concludes that the Ramik Wilson targeting penalty may very well have cost us the game. Hard to argue that, even though it was overturned. Which of course means the penalty stands/ Because that makes so much sense.
- Oh, and about those targeting calls. On the Ray Drew flag, here's Richt: "I don't think the rule's designed for that type of play quite frankly."
- It's important to note, as Marshall does here, that the defense has shown some improvement.
- Greg helps us reset for the bye week.
- As for the special teams miscues, Travis nails it with this: "You don't think we need [a special teams coach]? Fine. But don't act like it doesn't make sense to ask."
- DavetheDawg has 15 thoughts on the loss and the outlook overall.
- If you've been anxious for the new post season format, Year2 has a mock playoff post up.
- Lastly, I don't know about you, but watching a chocolate lab puppy body surf a staircase is one thing that always gets me to smile.

Cheer up Dawgs. At least you didn't wear jean shorts to work today.

That word problem was part of the 11yo's review for a test last week. Typically, Mrs. Bernie handles the math side of the homework equation. This theory has been tested since both girls moved on from 1st grade and thereby exceeded my math skills...exponentially. (BOOM! Least I can still spell!!)

But during this review the lovely wife was getting herself all did up and even lovelier at the salon. If I go to the barber and spend more than a half hour I feel cheated. Evidently these salons do hair as if they're giving a car a tune-up. It takes even longer than the Beatles took to sing an encore of Hey Jude and Let it Be. It'd take more time to give a HillBilly a full set of root canals, or teach a WarDamnTiglesman how to spell their school's name. Or get Congress to open up the state parks again.

You get it. Mrs. Bernie was gone for a spell. So I jumped in and was convinced I'd caught the teacher handing out wrong answers. The 11yo had brought home the correct answers for the study guide with 120 miles circled. When clearly it was closer to 180 - about 30 days, times about 6 miles each day = 180. I can estimate! I can multiply! I can scoff at someone better equipped to teach how to estimate and multiply! And read a word problem correctly. So I insisted my little darling take that up with "Dr. Mathematical" the next morning prior to the test. Surely a good teacher would see her own error and make any necessary adjustments prior to handing out some poorly planned test. I mean, really.

"But Daddy, she has the problems worked out on her website. Let's check that to see how she got 120 miles."

What kind of sorcery and witchcraft is this?!? Parents and students can check their work online...and figure out right then and there that weekdays equal five days a week and therefore about 20 a month...and that 20 times 6 is indeed equal to 120. Ol' Ray Goff shorted me 60 miles! What in the name of Terrell Davis is going on here?!?

The lesson I learned is to compliment the wife's hair as soon as she walks in three hours later. And also to give Dr. Mathematical a fistbump for being able to load pictures of her study guide's answer key on the internets. Something tells me she didn't go to college in Starkville. Have a great Monday Reader! And don't be a slackass that only runs five days a week. My math skills need your complete effort!

Bernie