Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Humpday Hilarity - nuptials and fatty acids

Last week I saw a young couple lining up for an obvious wedding ceremony on the deck of the boat we were on. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to push him overboard in time to save him a lifetime of pain, suffering and mental anguish.

I'm kidding. Of course. No really. I am. But if you're married and haven't at least questioned the sanctity of the union on occasion, you're either doing it wrong or you're the poor bastard on the ship that hasn't finished the honeymoon yet.

This one comes from Mac. The joke may not be his but he laughs the way that I do so I'm sharing it.
A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.

Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake."